Scooter Bandit

{ February 7, 2010 @ 5:28 pm } · { Regular Days }
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OK, not a bandit, but still a laugh riot! This story comes from a colleague . . . (thanks Karen L)

Apparently, there is a young teen who is stretching the “letter of the law” to its outer edges. His latest caper (he has been cited for other misdemeanors outside the library) is to ride his scooter (a motorized skateboard with handles) through the branch. That’s right, he opens the door and then rides like hell through the main floor and collection and back out again. He must think he’s the next Jason Bourne.

You would think the staff could stop him, but think about it: would you step in front of a moving scooter? Me either. It all happens so fast.

They yell at him as he flies by, but he only laughs. Once they actually managed to stop him at the door (quick thinking) and told him he was not allowed to ride in the branch and his reply: “There’s no sign that says I can’t do that.”

Interesting point of view, eh? Does that mean we have to have a sign for every possible infraction? Can you just imagine it?

Do not park your car inside the building.
Do not bring a bed and sleep overnight in the building.
Do not grill steaks in the building.
Do not bring portable showers and bathe in the building.

The list would be endless. How do you communicate “common sense” to someone who doesn’t seem to have any? Who would think you’d have to have a sign for riding a motorized “anything” in a library?

They have called the police, of course, but there’s not much they can do if they can’t catch him at it. He’s clever that way. I suppose it could be worse . . . he could be a flasher.

What would you do?

Singing in the Rain … or Snow

{ February 3, 2010 @ 10:47 am } · { Regular Days }
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We’ve got a singing patron. Oh, it’s not like he comes into the branch and cuts loose, but he does serenade us almost daily from a bench outside. Usually, it’s a bit of gospel singalong since he’s plugged into some kind of Ipod or MP3 player. But I don’t think he’s intentionally sharing his music.

Some days are better than others. And when I say better, I just mean he’s more tuneful.

Yesterday, I finally had to go out and speak to him as we started getting complaints from people sitting in the quiet room, inside the building. He was actually sweet about it and surprised that people could hear him.

You’d think he’d be cold out there. After all, we had 6 inches of snow on the ground.

Oh well, I think it’s the music that warms his soul.

Bandwidth vs. Regulars

{ January 26, 2010 @ 11:17 am } · { Regular Days }
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Well, some of our regulars have learned the magic word that really runs the show: bandwidth!

When our bandwidth is maxed out, everyone can tell. Games, tunes, MySpace, Facebook, you name it, they all come to a virtual standstill. Our reference desk has “traffic grapher” so we can tell if it’s incoming or outgoing traffic that is maxing us out. But since our branch is small, we usually walk around to let people know the slow down is due to a bandwidth issue. While we’re strolling through the public PC’s, we also scan for possible culprits. Generally, it’s hard to tell, so we gently mention that “someone” is uploading (or downloading) a large file and it’s affecting everyone’s performance. We hope for a little peer pressure–sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn’t.

The regular “boys” are the ones who get the most frustrated since their gaming is affected immediately: nothing worse than a medieval army getting caught up in a bandwidth vacuum. One day, our “Larry” (see previous post), decided to take matters into his own hands and came up to the desk and asked that we check the bandwidth. He said the librarians needed to walk the floor and get the other gamers off the pipe. When the librarian asked him why?, he informed her that he was at a critical point in his game and that took priority over the other games.

Interesting point of view.

It’s amazing how the expectations for service expand with the capability. It’s never enough. Certainly, we’ll never have enough bandwidth to satisfy the needs of all of our clients. As more and more apps move to the web, the demands will become greater, and not just for gamers. It’s a web world.

Amazingly enough, three of the seven guys who come in every day are now on laptops. I have no idea how they got them and I don’t ask. For them, it’s a huge win. They see it as a way to the web with less restraints and librarian monitoring. The only boondoggle? Bandwidth. I wonder if they’ll figure out that the laptops get dropped from the pipe first when traffic maxes? I think I’ll keep that piece of info to myself.

Positively Chocolate

{ January 10, 2010 @ 1:12 pm } · { Programming, Regular Days }
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Our library has just initiated our annual Winter Reading Program. Although it is geared for adults, we also encourage teenagers to participate. In our little branch, historically, one of the librarians has gone to the high school to book talk and plug our winter and spring programs.

With the recent change in personnel, the task of overseeing teen programming and selecting materials for teens has fallen to me. Yikes! The last time I faced a classroom of teenagers, I was a substitute teacher. And that was a regular nightmare!

I was really sweating bullets as I thought about the kids and how I could possibly keep them engaged for twenty minutes while I talked about books and the library. My own son said he would cut class and even take a cut slip before he’d sit through it. That was encouraging. Not!

So, I devised the age old trick: chocolate.

It worked! I spent two days at the high school, talked to 20 different classes of English students, from AP and Honors to the lowest levels, from Seniors to Freshmen, and the chocolate was my foot in the door. As I walked from classroom to classroom, I’d hear kids say, “Hey, chocolate lady” or “There’s the Library lady with the chocolate.” And not just little Hershey kisses either, I was giving out the big chunky Hershey kind as well as Snickers, Butterfingers and Nestles’ Crunch. It was play. And it was fun. I had a great time and so did they. And for me, it was worth every penny.

I tossed out chocolate for every time they could answer the questions correctly about the program start and end dates or how many books they had to read or if they could name the titles I had chatted up after I put them away in my “green bag.” Of course, they also got chocolate if they could figure out who my son was… when one group of sophomore girls figured it out, the hormones hit the ceiling, “That’s your son? Oh man, he is HOT!” [Girls, girls...I'm his mother for crying out loud.]

Oh, and what about our numbers? Not bad, I think we’re up to 68 registered teens. But you know what I like the best? The kids who come in now and just talk to me like they know me. Of course, I’m thinking, maybe it wasn’t the chocolate at all but the notoriety that comes from being the mother of a “player.” Oh well, whatever works.

Helpful Censor

{ January 4, 2010 @ 3:44 pm } · { Random Thoughts, Regular Days }
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I’ve seen a lot of different types of censorship in the library, from a patron demanding that a book be removed from the shelves, to permanent markings through objectionable words, to pictures cut out of books. But, this is the first time I’ve seen a “helpful censor” use correction tape to cover over the the words and phrases and then, in several cases, offer “better” word choices.

The one book brought to my attention was the Spiderwick Chronicles. Now, just off the top, I couldn’t remember anything particularly dicey in this series, so I was surprised when our children’s librarian came forward with the evidence.

Here are some specific (and apparently, hotly contested) examples of impropriety:

  • divorce was replaced with the words, “had moved.”
  • crappier was replaced with “only older.”
  • candy butt was simply covered up.
  • “Crap” said Jered was replaced with “Jered was looking around.”
  • not as crappy was replaced with “older Mallory but nearly…” and,
  • “Oh Crap!” was simply covered up.

I guess I’m appreciative of the thoughtfulness of the censor for using correction tape that could be peeled off again bringing the book back to its savage original.

But, I do worry, what will we find when the young reader wants to graduate to something really deleterious like “It’s Not the Stork” or “The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big Round Things.”

Small Surprises

{ December 3, 2009 @ 10:25 pm } · { Regular Days }
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Just when I thought it would be a humdrum week after the holiday lull, we had a small surprise waiting for us in the men’s restroom at closing tonight.

It’s not like we haven’t had “small surprises” before. You know, the usual stuff: feces in the urinal, shredded toilet paper all over the floor, a flood from a stopped up toilet, vomit from a child “who didn’t quite make it,” and so forth. But the surprise tonight was a lulu: in the handicap accessible stall of the men’s room were four ladies’ thongs.

At first discovery, my mind raced. What could have happened here? Were there really four teenage (or older) girls in the men’s room stall? What were they doing? No. Oh come on, could we have missed that kind of a party? Did they actually have sex in there? No. Come on. Not possible, right? Right?

And of course, in the meeting room tonight we had a special program, Emily Dickinson Live!, with a local performer. We had a huge crowd of people who don’t normally come to the library. How many of our male guests went into the restroom to discover female underwear on the floor? How long were those thongs in there? No one mentioned it, but then, what would a fellow say? “Ahem, pardon me, but there are four pairs of ladies’ underwear in the men’s room and by all appearances, it looks like whoever had them on was in a hurry to take them off.” Sigh.

Maybe our culprits were the two elementary school aged boys who rushed into the men’s room at the last minute before we closed? But where did they get skimpy girls underwear? Did they steal them from their sisters’ dresser in order to drop them into the four corners of the men’s room stall? That’s a stretch.

All right, I confess, we gave up after two or three scenarios. It must have been a set up… a joke. Right?
… At least, we hope so…. What do you think?

Regular Oddities

{ November 18, 2009 @ 5:06 pm } · { Regular Days }
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Every library has at least one or two “characters” who are regulars but behave oddly. Sometimes, these folks are a problem and require action, but generally, they are just gentle souls who are struggling with the challenges of living in this world.

One of our regulars is primarily concerned with identify theft. We have been through periods when she is certain that one of the librarians has stolen her identity but usually, it’s someone from the outside world like a stranger at the drugstore or grocery store. As a result of this fixation, she often needs information assistance to find websites and/or contact information for various legal organizations, judges, and identity theft professionals. She has written letters and made dozens of phone calls to lawyers and judges and editors of various newspapers.

We actually do our best to make her time in the library comfortable but it does seems like something always happens to turn things upside down. One day, when she was still carrying a lot of her belongings with her (again, to protect her identity), she set the bags down in our foyer. Unfortunately, that same day, another patron was collecting clothing to donate to charity and assumed those bags were donations. It was very difficult to convince our friend that this was an accident and not an intentional theft of her personal belongings. Everything was cleared up and returned the next day, but for her, the items were no longer viable as she believed they had been worn and so she discarded them and started over.

Another day, we assisted her in photocopying pictures of models from Vanity Fair. The magazine is larger than a standard piece of paper and so we had to adjust the copier settings. Once we got everything ready and she made her copies, she thanked us kindly and then showed us the pictures saying, “I forgot what I used to look like.”

Another day, she needed pictures of herself to send to someone. We apologized that we really couldn’t help her with that. In the end, we turned around to find her pressing her face up against the copier glass and was copying it… front and side.

It’s funny sometimes but it’s also sad. And what is our role as public servants to our troubled patrons? Will we know or recognize that day when this woman might need an intervention or professional assistance?

Getting a Red Card!

{ November 14, 2009 @ 12:59 pm } · { Regular Days }
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We have been really struggling with some of our teen patrons. Mostly it’s just regular old teen rowdiness which is OK and expected at times, but there’s one group of girls who have really started dropping what we call the “F-bomb” in the library….and I mean loudly and inappropriately.

One day, it got so bad that we had to ask a group to leave and as one of the staff escorted them out, they regaled her with a string of expletives that would embarrass a sailor. We had to do something.

So, here’s our plan: it’s the old soccer “red card” system modified. First, we’ll use a gentle verbal warning and explain that we’ll be doing “strikes” or “penalty cards” after that. We tell them we would prefer NOT to do this but we’re finding it’s the only way to get a handle on noise and inappropriate behavior (we also have small signs to this effect in each work station). If the same person (or group) goes to the next level, we pass out a yellow card that says, “Please be considerate of others around you.” … The next level is an orange card that says, “…Strike Two is for behaviors that are not appropriate in the library.” And finally, the RED CARD, that says, “Please leave the premises for the rest of the library day.” This red card will also generate an internal incident report and hopefully a name to start building documentation.

Here’s the funny part: so far, in two weeks, we have only handed out one yellow card… most of the kids who were asked to leave that one day have not been back. On the day we started the plan, I spoke to one of the ringleaders and explained what we would be doing. I told her that she had to understand, no matter how angry a person is, one cannot attack library staff verbally. It’s simply not right. When I asked her if she would speak to her grandmother or aunt that way, her eyes got very wide, “No way!” she said.

Well, let’s see how it goes.

How do you handle truly offensive behavior in your library (whether adults or teens)?

Book Mites

{ November 9, 2009 @ 5:39 pm } · { Regular Days }
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It’s 4:30 in the afternoon on a Friday and I’m the one who who gets the goofy phone call.

The woman was quite pleasant and said several times that she was not complaining at all, but she thought we should know that our books had book mites. She said she was quite the bookworm and she knew for a fact that most books (particularly old ones) have mites and usually, she simply microwaves all of her books before she reads them.

Unfortunately, she hadn’t considered that our library books have RFID tags (aka, metal) in the back of the book and so, she managed to burn a hole through the back of the book. No problem, she said, she would pay for the book, but… what should she do with the next library book?

I asked her if she was sure it was our books that had mites? “Well, she said, “the mites are crawling up my arms.”

So back to the real reason for her call: how should she get rid of the mites in our library books since she couldn’t microwave them but she really wanted to read them. Uh… my brave answer: I have no idea!

Like any good librarian, I took her name and phone number and said I’d get back to her. After telling my nearest colleague about this conversation and chortling for several minutes, we began discussing some of possibilities and searching the web … but what if they’re not book mites at all? What if the lady has bedbugs? (They are coming back, you know.) What if it’s some other kind of bug? What if she has just regular lice and doesn’t realize it? Sigh.

After a careful search (well, the 4:45 in the afternoon kind of search)… it appears that book mites do exist. They do not, however, eat books. They eat glue and they love dark places. Were they crawling up our patron’s arm? I doubt it. Book mites (also known as book lice) love dark, moist places. They are not fond of human skin, hair, or anything else. The only way to really get rid of book mites is to remove any and all humidity. Good luck with that. One article did mention that one could put the books in a freezer (at 0 degrees) for four hours.

So, I dutifully called our patron back and gave her the bad news: low humidity, light, and maybe a freezer. “Well, she said, I think I’ll put them in a plastic bag and try the freezer method. Thanks so much.”

I guess I’ll have to warn the Circulation Department … if we get any frozen books in the book drop, we’ll know the culprit. In the meantime, I can’t wait to see the microwaved book and its RFID tag burned through the back cover!

The Break Room

{ October 30, 2009 @ 3:07 pm } · { Regular Days }
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OMG… there is always food in our break room. Either it’s leftovers from a holiday or it’s leftovers from a program the night before or it’s “Surprise! I went to Dunkin’ Donuts today!”

Today, the break room table is loaded with mini-pretzels (from the Pretzel Factory), four different sauces, and a blueberry coffee cake. There are only five of us working today (Fridays are short staffed because of Saturday); that’s a lot of food for five people. I’ve gained weight just looking at all those carbohydrates.

On Monday, I predict we’ll have lots and lots of candy… post Halloween.

But what about the infamous refrigerator? Now, there’s a door I rarely want to open. Who knows what might be lurking in there! Green fuzzies crawling out of re-used margarine containers or a spilled container of home-made soup? I took a peek today and there were all kinds of wrapped up items in blue bags. Mysterious packages are always trouble in a staff refrigerator!

While we’re talking appliances, how about the break room sink? Now there’s a breeding ground for all kinds of critters. Even after the many signs we have put up, dishes end up sitting in the sink and on the adjoining counters. (People really believe they’ll remember they left that pot to “soak.”) This must be universal problem since I checked on the web and you can actually buy signs or t-shirts that show or say things like: Clean Up After Yourself, Your Mother Doesn’t Work Here. Or this:
clean-up after yourself or this: The maid-quit

And how about the disappearing silverware? I mean, really, why would anyone want a mismatched spoon or fork? But somehow, as the days go by, the spoons and forks and knives walk away.

Our break room is so small that a person sitting at the table has to move for someone who wants to get into the refrigerator or use the microwave. And of course, we only have one outlet in there so the coffee pot, microwave, toaster oven, and a 4-drink soda machine cannot be used at the same time.

It always makes me wonder who designs these rooms? Probably the same guy who designs public restroom stalls for women!!!

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